The latest chapter in the life of God’s appointed huckster Joel Osteen sheds additional light on why Comrade Trump was able to con enough voters to become disciplines of his faux populism.  Osteen, as you may know is the poster boy for what has become known as “the prosperity theology,” described on Wikipedia as:

… a religious belief among some Christians, who hold that financial blessing and physical well-being are always the will of God for them, and that faith, positive speech, and donations to religious causes will increase one’s material wealth. Prosperity theology views the Bible as a contract between God and humans: if humans have faith in God, he will deliver security and prosperity.

The doctrine emphasizes the importance of personal empowerment, proposing that it is God’s will for his people to be happy. The atonement (reconciliation with God) is interpreted to include the alleviation of sickness and poverty, which are viewed as curses to be broken by faith. This is believed to be achieved through donations of money, visualization, and positive confession.

Sound familiar?  To paraphrase, the mantra “Make America Great Again” is nothing more than “a contract between Trump and humans: if humans have faith in Trump, he will deliver security and prosperity.”  And the congregation responds with positive confessions such as “Lock her up,”  “Build the wall” and “Jews will not replace us.”  As the Atlantic Magazine reported following Trump’s “I Alone Can Fix It” acceptance speech at the Republican National Convention, “Breaking with two centuries of political tradition, Donald Trump didn’t ask Americans to place their trust in each other or in God, but rather, in Trump.”

Talk about targeted marketing?  Who better would be susceptible to Trump’s impersonation of Huey Long, among others, than followers of Joel Osteen and his ilk. Congregants treated to a weekly dose of spiritual perversion in which the rich will inherit the earth and sending your hard-earned cash to televangelists in Armani suits promises a five-star return on investment.

The only thing missing is an off-Broadway musical with a toe-tapping soundtrack to fill the flock’s idle minds.  UNTIL NOW.  From the producers of MacTrump and West Wing Story, I bring you GOVspell, a melodic romp through what one can only hope is an abbreviated one-act play.  And you won’t want to be without the soundtrack which includes the following.

• Prepare Ye the Way from the Left
• Bless the Loan
• Turn Back, O Manafort
• Save the Putin
• A Lash for You
• Date by Date
• All Good Grifts
• Learn Your Alt-Facts Well
• Links of the World
• We Bescreech Thee

Previews open and close this fall at the Robert Mueller Theater (formerly the U.S. District Courthouse) in Washington, D.C.

For what it’s worth.
Dr. ESP