All posts by Dr. ESP

UPA, UPA

Comic Relief

The Washington Post is reporting there was a little publicized side-bet between Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau and King Donald.  Usually such wagers involve a culinary delight symbolic of the cities represented in major sporting events.  For example, following the Eagles victory in Super Bowl LIX, Kansas City mayor Quinton Lucas sent Philadelphia mayor Cherelle Parker a shipment of Gates BBQ.  If the Chiefs had completed the three-peat, Parker would have reciprocated with Philly Cheesesteaks.

However, the stakes associated with last night’s final game in the National Hockey League’s “4 Nation Face-Off” between the United States and Canada were much, much higher.  A bucket of KFC extra crispy versus a bowl of poutine would not suffice.  Based on the fact that Team USA defeated Canada just five days earlier during the round robin phase of the tournament and the game would be played on America’s home ice (the Boston Garden), Trump prepared an executive order challenging Trudeau to the equivalent of a WWE death match.  Assuming his support would assure a USA victory, Trump saw the contest as a shortcut to fulfilling his pipe dream of Canada becoming the 51st state.

In other words, the losing team must cede sovereignty to the winner.  Which explains Trudeau’s tweet (above) immediately following Connor McDavid’s sudden death goal at 8:18 of the first overtime period, giving Canada a 3-2 victory.  Therefore, on July 1, the 158th anniversary of the British North America Act by which Canada became a self-governing member of the British Empire, all 50 U.S. states will become members of the Canadian federation, also known as the United Provinces of America.

An official ceremony, reminiscent of Robert E. Lee’s surrender to Ulysses S. Grant at the Appomattox, Virginia courthouse, will be held on Parliament Hill in Ottawa, Ontario.  While the details have not been finalized, the word on “la rue” is that the observance will culminate with Trump laying down his bull horn and five iron.  Trudeau and Parliament will then appoint a commission to determine the boundaries and names of the new provinces.  While everything is on the table, one MP suggested there is no need to have two provinces with similar names.  “One Dakota, Carolina or Virginia is enough.”

I cannot wait until the 2026 Winter Olympics when attendees from North America will be rooting for their home team, “UPA, UPA.”

The Upside

During my tenure as a professor at Miami University, we had a colleague who, like Trump, had the uncanny ability to pick losers in every major and minor sporting event.  It was, however, impossible to definitively prove if this relationship was causal or mere correlation.  Based on his picks for the Super Bowl and the 4 Nations Face-Off, Trump appears to be the heir apparent to our colleague, ensuring negative outcomes for favored teams.  Whether causal or correlation is irrelevant.  Both have an upside.  For example, if you are New York Yankees hater, just post on Truth Social that Hal Steinbrenner (Yankee owner) thinks the 4 Nations Face-Off final game and Trump is still the president of what Google maps has labeled Lower Canada.  Trump will surely reply “#me too,” thus ensuring the Bronx Bombers will have another under-achieving season.

For what it’s worth.
Dr. ESP

Huh?

Media, Politics

One of my favorite segments on “Late Night with Seth Meyers” is “Amber Says What.”  It features Late Night writer and comedian Amber Ruffin in which she races through the most outrageous headlines since her last appearance followed by various intonations of the word, “What?”  The goal is to share the absolute absurdity of current events.  Since January 20, I have created more unfinished posts than I have published on this site.  Why?  Because none of the topics merit the kind of explanation which requires a detailed entry to clarify the issue or make a point.  The headline is self-declarative.  Therefore, today I am offering a new Deprogramming101 feature, “Dr. ESP says HUH.”

Today, the U.S. Senate will vote to confirm Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. to be secretary of the Department of Health and Human Services.  Just to make sure I was not missing something, I Googled the phrase, “Rotary International Opposes RFK, Jr. Nomination.”  Why?  Because this organization has spent the last 35 years and more than $2.5 billion to eradicate polio.  The headline on the first hit referred to a letter from the Leadership Conference on Civil and Human Rights to each U.S. senator.  It began, “The undersigned 87 organizations representing diverse interests and sectors urge you to vote against Robert F. Kennedy, Jr.’s nomination to serve as secretary of (HHS) and to publicly announce your opposition as soon as possible if you have not already done so.”  Rotary International was not among the signatories.  HUH?

Donald Trump signs declaration formally renaming the Gulf of Mexico as the Gulf of America during flight on Air Force One to attend the Super Bowl in New Orleans.  Trump was interrupted by the following announcement by the pilot.

Ladies and Gentlemen, if you could please direct your attention outside the right side of the aircraft, Air Force One is currently in international waters.  For the first time in history we are flying over the recently renamed Gulf of America.

HUH?  Didn’t the pilot’s acknowledgement that the Gulf is actually “international waters” undercut Trump’s ability to rename it.

During an Oval Office press conference, Elon Musk justifies his role as head of the “Department of Government Efficiency.”  While Trump sat quietly at the Resolute desk, Musk responded to a reporter’s question about his authority to overhaul the federal government.

And if you asked the founders today and said, what do you think of the way things have turned out? Well, we have this unelected, fourth unconstitutional branch of government, which is the bureaucracy, which has in a lot of ways currently more power than any elected representative. And this is not something that people want, and it does not match the will of the people. So it’s just something we’ve got to fix.

HUH?  As pointed out by everyone from the New York Times to “The Daily Show,”  Musk’s lack of self-awareness may be bigger than his net worth and his teenage protege Edward Coristine’s (aka “Big Balls”) genitalia.

Trump suggests U.S. sovereignty should expand to Canada, Panama, Greenland and Gaza.  HUH?  Didn’t he run on a foreign policy platform of “no more nation-building or regime change?”  In defense of Trump’s plan to rebuild Gaza, press secretary Carolyn Leavitt quoted Albert Einstein, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”  Yet Trump’s plan to rebuild Gaza sounds an awful lot like the U.S. experiences in Vietnam, Afghanistan and Iraq.

Iowa Senator Joni Ernst says she’s loving what DOGE is doing.  (Source: Fox Business, February 10, 2025)  Ernst seeks to exempt farm and small business assets in deciding who gets financial aid.  (Source: Des Moines Register, February 11, 2025)  HUH?  Pretty clear message.  Slash federal spending but don’t you dare touch my voters’ share.

I hope you enjoyed this inaugural edition of “Dr. ESP says HUH.”  Somehow, I doubt it will be the last one.

For what it’s worth.
Dr. ESP

Populism, My Ass

Random Thoughts

In 1971, the Oscar winner for best animated short was a 2 minute 18 second cartoon by Ted Petok titled “The Crunch Bird.”  In search of a gift for her grumpy and unhappy husband, the wife decides he might like a pet.  After rejecting a dog or a cat, she decides her husband would prefer a bird.  Despite warnings by the pet shop owner this particular bird might be dangerous, she purchases it and brings it home to surprise her husband.  I suggest you watch the original (link below) before reading my 2025 revision of the script.

THE CRUNCH BIRD

The revised 2025 script.

NARRATOR:  Once upon a time there was a political party that set out to give America a gift.  America was not bankrupt.  Or angry.  Or cruel.  In fact, most Americans were too busy trying to get ahead at work, raising a family and enjoying occasional recreational opportunities.  But America was frustrated with the cost of living, efforts to make everyone feel welcome and spending taxpayer dollars on foreign wars.

POLITICAL PARTY:  I know.   I’ll give America a new governing philosophy.

NARRATOR:  So the political party found the philosophy store and told the shopkeeper that it wanted to give America a new and very different political philosophy.

SHOPKEEPER:  Perhaps America would like supply-side economics.

POLITICAL PARTY:  No, we tried that, more than once, and America didn’t like it.

SHOPKEEPER:  Then maybe America would like compassionate conservatism.

POLITICAL PARTY:  No, we tried that too.  And America was so turned off, it made a black man the country’s leader.  Say, what’s that?  (pointing at a foreboding looking political philosophy)

SHOPKEEPER:  Oh, that’s populism.  But America wouldn’t want that.  It’s too dangerous to have around.  Let me show you.  Populism, the Constitution.  (Populism devours the Constitution)

POLITICAL PARTY.  That’s amazing.  America will love this. We can promise no more deficit spending.  No more ObamaCare.  No more nation building.  How much does that cost?  (Rumor has it the retail price was $288 million.  To no one’s surprise, the political party recruited the richest man in the world to write the check.)

NARRATOR:  So the political party offered America populism and promised it would devour all the things that made America less wealthy, less safe and, of course, less Eurocentric.  Soon America came home after a long day at work.  She turns on the TV and sees the political party espousing the virtues of the new political philosophy.

AMERICA:  What is that?  What the hell is that ugly thing?

POLITICAL PARTY:  It’s for you.   Populism.

AMERICA:  Populism, my ass.

For what it’s worth.
Dr. ESP

“This Is America”

Culture

Since January 20, a lot of us have spent a great deal of psychic energy trying to cope with the daily fire hose of lies and nonsense which we all knew would accompany the second coming of Donald J. Trump.  Perhaps the best piece of advice in an effort to remain sane in the face of madness involves a renewed focus on local community.  On Amelia Island there are many ways to reposition one’s perspective on national events.  A small, but close-knit circle of kindred spirits.  Volunteer and charitable efforts directed toward those who already are or will be likely victims of the Trump administration’s rejection of the social contract between a nation of great wealth and those in need.  Despite the abnormally cold temperatures, a twice weekly round of golf at the municipal course where you are greeted by name and with a smile by staff who know your schedule so well they automatically schedule the following week’s tee times without asking.  But most of all, enjoying the natural assets of one of the most unique bio-environments in America, one that includes an ocean seashore, salt marsh and maritime forest.

However, these “sanctuaries” are not immune to the cultish behavior of the MAGA universe.  As you walk from the eighth green to the ninth tee on the South Course at the Fernandina Beach Golf Club, you are greeted by a four by eight foot banner plastered across a homeowner’s fence reminding you Trump is going to make America great again.  But the final straw came on Friday when I biked the nature preserve near our home to see if any of the resident alligators were taking advantage of the warmer weather to make a rare winter appearance.  No gators, but several bird species and a host of turtles enjoying the afternoon sun when I observed a man accompanying his unleashed German Shepherd. 

When I asked him if he had seen the sign at the head of the trail which informed visitors that all dogs needed to be leashed.  His reply?  “This is America.  There are no rules.”  My first instinct was to challenge his premise.  “Oh, there are rules, you simply choose not to follow them.”  But I caught myself; he was correct.  In today’s America, you can desecrate the nation’s Capitol and be pardoned.  You can assault law enforcement officers with no consequences.  You can try to overthrow the government and get off scot free.   Why then would anyone think they have to leash their dog.  Or come to a complete stop at a stop sign.  Or share the road with cyclists.  

As I tried to teach my creativity students, insight does not come from observation alone.  It requires reflection, time for the brain to process what it senses.  In the past two days, I realized the Trump cult is not a monolith.  He and his sycophants have built a coalition of support, not by presenting a single vision of America, but by letting more than enough segments of society believe the administration shares their respective view of our country.  The individual I encountered on Egans Creek Greenway, an apparent libertarian, is thrilled that the United States has embraced anarchy.  The wealthy hope Trump ushers in a Russian-styled oligarchy.  Christian nationalists pray for a theocracy.  Insecure males are thrilled to join the chorus that proudly sings, “It’s a man’s world.”  Racists, homophobes and xenophobes need only believe Trump is focused on their desire for a more white, straight or Eurocentric America.

That’s a mighty big tent, especially when only 63.9 percent of voting age Americans cast a ballot.  Whether intended or not, they will interpret Trump’s words and actions as affirmation by each of these groups that he is with them.  And nothing Democrats or liberals can say will change their mind.  This is not about politics.  It is about culture.  And the cultural question that needs the most attention is simple.  Your vote IS the difference.  The message for the next four years is straight forward. 

  • You did not lose your health care because Trump is president.  You lost it because you did NOT vote. 
  • If you are now paying for child care for your three to five year old because Head Start was terminated, it is not because Trump is president.  It is because you did NOT vote.
  • When consumer goods cost more, it is not because of Trump tariffs.  It is because you did NOT vote.

Upon his election as the new chair of the Democratic National Committee, Ken Martin got it wrong.  “The fight is for our values. The fight is for working people. The fight right now is against Donald Trump and the billionaires who bought this country.”  The real fight is to remind non-voters, any grievance with Trump, oligarchs, incompetent cabinet secretaries and agency heads can only be corrected if they register and cast a ballot.  Again, that requires a change in culture, not politics.  I am sorry to have to inform you if you believe in democracy.  Without broader participation in the political process, “that is NOT today’s America.”

For what it’s worth.
Dr. ESP

Barking Up the Wrong Tree

Politics

Democrats slammed the confirmation process, with some fuming that lawmakers were not given access to an FBI background check detailing the sordid allegations.

~Juliegrace Brufke/The Daily Beast

In the Coen brothers 2009 film “A Serious Man,” protagonist Larry Gopnik (portrayed by Michael Stuhlbarg), suffering from a growing series of misfortunes, seeks the guidance of his rabbi.  During the session, the rabbi tells Gopnik about another congregant, Sussman the dentist, who had sought his advice.  Sussman, while casting a mold of a non-Jewish (a goy) patient’s teeth, discovers Hebrew letters etched on the inside of his lower teeth, when translated, say, “Help me.”  Is it a sign from God?  The scene ends as follows:

GOPNIK: So what did you tell him?
RABBI:  Sussman?
GOPNIK:  Yes!
RABBI:  Is it…relevant?
GOPNIK:  Well–isn’t that why you’re telling me?
RABBI:  We can’t know everything.
GOPNIK (to himself): It sounds like you don’t know anything.

Exasperated and curious, Gopnik asks, “And what happened to the goy?”  To which the rabbi replies, “The goy?  Who cares?”

I came to the same conclusion as I watched excerpts of the Senate Armed Services Committee confirmation hearings for Defense Secretary designee Pete Hegseth, confirmed in the opening quote.  “Is it…relevant?”  “So, he cheats on his wife, drinks to excess and when it comes to financial management is a complete failure.  Who cares?”  Ulysses S. Grant was a alcoholic.  John Kennedy was a philanderer.  Donald Trump filed for bankruptcy six times.  NOBODY CARES.  So why waste time on the irrelevant.

In a country of 350 million citizens, there are drunks, whoremongers and shysters who would make damn good Defense secretaries because they have the knowledge and experience to understand when and where lethal force is the appropriate response to an international crisis.  The secretary’s primary job is not to count beans or micromanage the HR department.  (The Heritage Foundation will find other loyalists, who do not face Senate confirmation, to do those jobs.)  He is there to advise the president about military options as a tool of foreign policy and whether there exists sufficient capacity to wield that hammer.  Why not ask Hegseth:

  • When do think it is appropriate for the U.S. military to engage in a regional conflict?
  • How many such conflicts do we have the capacity to take on at one time?
  • What criteria will you use to determine the appropriate balance among land, air, naval and space assets in the next defense budget?

Unfortunately, this ship has already sailed.  One can only imagine the vague or inaccurate answers Hegseth might have provided.  Those responses would have had a better chance of embarrassing one more Republican enough to vote no on Friday.

There are other cabinet and agency heads proposed for the administration still to be evaluated.  And the slew of executive orders provide grist for those nomination hearings.  Perhaps the best opportunity to test this approach is the upcoming hearings before the Senate Committee on Health, Education, Labor and Pensions for HHS designee Robert Kennedy, Jr.  Forget the brain worm, dead bear prank and other RFK memes.  Ranking member Bernie Sanders should engage the nominee in the following discussion.

Mr. Kennedy, could you describe for the committee the demographics of the Medicaid program?

If Kennedy says he cannot or gives inaccurate guesses, Sanders should educate him, especially as it relates to the number of retired Americans who depend on a combination of Medicare and Medicaid for their health care.

Mr. Kennedy, the congressional DOGE caucus has circulated a document that includes cuts to Medicare to fund President Trump’s tax cuts.  Are you prepared to strip millions of American’s of their health care to give additional tax breaks to Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos and Mark Zuckerberg?

Regardless of RFK’s answer, I have complete confidence Sanders can produce a sound bite that can be used by every Democratic candidate for Congress in 2026.  The Democratic mantra for the next two years should be:

When it actually has to govern, MAGA is its own worst enemy.  Do not get in its way.  Just be on the record as opposing bad policies and document their impact.

For what it’s worth.
Dr. ESP