Today’s post is about life imitating comedy, in cinema and on television.  The two examples I have chosen to make this point are responses to major news stories this past week.

The End of an Elusive Search

The first case is inspired by a pivotal scene in Ivan Reitman’s 1984 production of Ghostbusters.  The commercial potential of a company which purports “to serve all you supernatural elimination needs” is questionable until a call comes in from the manager of the Sedgewick Hotel.  To which receptionist Janine (Ann Potts) shouts, “We got one!”

That was exactly how I felt when I realized my search for a non-hypocritical conservative finally ended.  The occasion was Tuesday’s 6-3 decision in Moore v. Harper by which the Supreme Court rejected “the independent legislature theory” that state legislatures were not subject to judicial review.  For the record, this theory which would have nullified the system of checks and balances among the three branches of government when it came to federal elections was at the heart of Trump campaign lawyer John Easton’s “fake electors” strategy.

What does this have to do with a search for non-hypocritical conservatives?  On video presented by the January 6 House Select Committee, White House lawyer Eric Herschmann testified he told Eastman he could expect unanimous dismissal of the theory if it came before the Supreme Court.  So, even though the 6-3 decision in the North Carolina case was a welcome relief, the dissenting justices suggested the broader issues may not be resolved.

Who were the three dissenting justices?  Clarence Thomas, Samuel Alito and Neil Gorsuch.  And what do these three have in common besides their support of the plaintiff Moore?  

• On April 6, 2023, ProPublica confirmed Justice Thomas was regularly treated to lavish vacations by Texas real estate developer Harlan Crow.  It was later reported Crow bought Thomas’ mother’s home where she continues to live rent free and covered private school tuition for a nephew who lived with the Thomas and his wife Virginia.  Thomas did not report any of these gifts.
• On April 25, 2023, Politico reported Justice Gorsuch failed to report the buyer of a 40-acre tract of land in Colorado in which he had a 20 percent interest.  Gorsuch made a profit in excess of $250,000 on the deal.  The buyer was identified as Greenberg Traurig, who has been a party to or filed an amicus brief in 12 cases while Gorsuch was on the Court.
• On June 20, 2023, ProPublica reported Justice Alito was treated to an Alaskan fishing holiday, including transportation and lodging by hedge fund manager Paul Singer, who came before the Court 10 times following the fishing trip. Alito did not report the gift.

Furthermore, these three justices have opposed any Congressional oversight of these alleged violations of judicial ethics.  Therefore, no one should be surprised they do not believe potentially unconstitutional actions by a politically motivated state legislature should be subject to judicial review.  Do not get me wrong.  They represent a threat to the system of checks and balances which ensure none of the three branches of government are unilaterally able to impose their will.  But at least they are not hypocrites.  In the same sense an armed criminal who instantly kills his victim can be credited with being a skilled marksman.

Rochelle, Rochelle: The Sequel (with apologies to non-fans of Seinfeld)

Several episodes of the sitcom Seinfeld included references to an imaginary motion picture Rochelle, Rochelle.  In Season 4, Jerry, George and Elaine arrive at a multiplex cinema only to learn tickets are sold out for the movie they wanted to see.  They decide to stay and take in Rochelle, Rochelle, advertised as “a young girl’s strange, erotic journey from Milan to Minsk.” Unimpressed, they leave half-way through.  Later in Season 4, George wants to see how it ends and rents it at the local video store but is charged an exorbitant fee when he forgets to rewind the VCR tape.  In Season 6, the film is adapted as a Broadway musical starring Bette Midler, in which the title song includes the following lyrics.

Well, you made a long journey from Milan to Minsk,
Rochelle, Rochelle.
You never stopped hoping now your in a Pinsk.
Roshelle, Rochelle.
When the naysayers “nay” you picked up your pace.
You said nothing’s going to stop me so get out of my face.
I’m having adventures all over the place.
Rochelle, ROCHELLE!

Since there have been gender-reversal adaptations of movies such as Ghostbusters and Oceans 11, I decided maybe Rochelle, Rochelle deserved a similar treatment.  Therefore, I am pleased to present Yevgeny, Yevgeny: The Musical, starring Terry O’Quinn, best remembered as John Locke in the series Lost.  It opens with the following title number:

Well, you made a long journey from Mariupol to Minsk,
Yevgeny, Yevgeny.
You planned to stop in Moscow but you landed in Pinsk.
Yevgeny, Yevgeny.
When the naysayers “nay” you loaded the tanks.
You headed for the Kremlin but your coup was only a prank.
Now you’re likely more destined to just walk the plank.
Yevgeny, YEVGENY!

I know.  Now that I finished the novel, I have way too much time on my hands.

For what it’s worth.
Dr. ESP