Validation of Strangers

 

Image result for seth meyers amy adamsOn Monday night’s installment of “Late Night,” host Seth Meyers and guest Amy Adams discussed how they felt about their children following in their footsteps.  Meyers hoped his young son would not, like his father, desperately need “the validation of strangers.”  My first thought?  Had Meyers coined the 21st century version of Blanche DuBois’ classic line from A Street Car Named Desire, “I have always depended on the kindness of strangers.”  Except in Meyer’s situation, it was not about physical necessities, but mental dependency.

[NOTE:  In almost every case when you Google a word or phrase, the search engine most likely returns pages of references.  However, when I searched for the phrase “validation of strangers” there were only TWO relevant entries.  Of the two, the most interesting, written by Brian Newton, a licensed clinical psychologist, was not based on research but from his own personal experience.  Newton felt those who knew him personally, whether they had a positive or negative impression, would bring that bias to their assessment of his work. Only the stranger would judge his performance solely on its merits.]

Yet, as the phrase continued to bounce around in my head, I soon realized Meyers may have stumbled on a motivating force of human nature that transcends the entertainment business.  As a blogger, I periodically check the number of unique visitors who read each article.  Is that not also a desire to know whether individuals, most of whom I’ve never met from locations around the globe, find my writing to be of value?  Besides the monetary compensation associated with their enterprises, one has to believe Jeff Bezos (Amazon) or Mark Zuckerberg (FaceBook) get a certain satisfaction knowing millions, if not billions, of anonymous patrons value what they offer.

With the exception of service providers who work with clients face-to-face, the “validation of strangers” is an untapped key to success.  In most enterprises, one’s market consists overwhelmingly of strangers.  Guy Kowasaki, CEO of Garage.com, tells aspiring entrepreneurs to offer products which your customers love even if the non-buyers hate it.  Each purchase is a validation by a stranger.  In this sense, validation of strangers is the nuclear energy which encourages inventors, entrepreneurs and entertainers to satisfy the needs of individuals they will never meet.

Yet, the validation of strangers, like nuclear technology, has the potential to  be a destructive force.  On the same evening, Meyers introduced the concept to his audience, Donald Trump filled an 8,000 seat Tampa, Florida auditorium with strangers.  Strangers who cheered when he:

  • Accused Florida Senator Bill Nelson of “putting criminal aliens over American citizens.” (LIE)
  • Said Democrats are trying to give illegal aliens the right to vote. (LIE)
  • Claimed his approval rating was higher than any Republican president. (LIE)
  • Pegged the trade deficit with China at $500 billion a year. (LIE)
  • Took credit for the “biggest tax cuts and reform in American history.”  (LIE)
  • Ignorantly suggested Americans need a photo ID to buy groceries. (LIE)
  • Continued his attack on the free press and once-again labeled the investigation into Russian interference in the 2016 election a “rigged witch-hunt.”

When 8,000 strangers validate this nonsense, not only is it an incentive to repeat lies.  It is a license to voice even more outrageous claims and escalate the hostile tone of the discourse.  Not to mention the validation of  63 million voters who pulled the lever for Trump  in 2016 (even though it was a minority of total votes cast) or his 32.4 million Twitter followers (not all of whom are Trump supporters).

Hillary Clinton unfortunately made a tactical mistake by calling them “deplorables.”  The more appropriate label is “validator.”  So, when farmers in the Heartland see the markets for their crops diminish as a result of Trump tariffs or a family in rural Tennessee realizes the cheap TrumpCare insurance policy they bought does not cover the medical treatment they need, do not be surprised if they ask, “Who let this happen?”  Simply hand them a mirror.

For what it’s worth.
Dr. ESP

 

3 thoughts on “Validation of Strangers

  1. “… the general culture is often stupid or evil and would vote out God in favor of the devil if he fed them back their hate and fear in a way that made them feel righteous.” Quote attributed to Jefferson Davis’ wife, Varina, in a new novel by Charles Frazier.

  2. tRUMP will convince them it’s the Democrats’s fault. Or perhaps Hillary or Obama specifically. Just like shutting down the government is going to be the Democrats fault. As you know, the Russians are already rigging the elections in favor of the Democrats.

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