Easy A

During a recent joint appearance with President Joe Biden, pro-Palestinian protesters interrupted Barack Obama.  To which, after stipulating that he shared their concerns about the humanitarian crisis in Gaza, Obama said, “No, no, you can’t just talk.  You also have to listen.”  Picking sides in the on-going Israel/Hamas conflict is tough, even for life-long supporters of Israel including Biden, Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer and me.  If there were a college course, based on Socratic dialogue, to determine a solution to this decades-old conundrum, participants would be hard-pressed to come up with a quick solution.

Even a genie would be stumped, as evidenced by a classic joke I first heard told by the late Gilbert Gottfried.

An old man finds a lamp.  When he picks it up, a genie appears and offers to grant him one wish.  The old man pulls a map of the Middle East out of his pocket and says, “This region has been torn by hatred, death and destruction for thousands of years.  I wish everyone could live together in peace.”

The genie replies, “I’m sorry, but even I can’t do that.  Is there a another wish I might grant you?”

The old man says, “I’ve been married for 50 years, and in all that time, my wife has never given me a [specific sex act.]  I wish she would do this just once before we die.”

The genie hesitates, then says, “Can I see that map again.”

This morning, I realized there is an approach which might translate into an “easy A” in that class.  And though I find myself conflicted by the path to this simple solution, it results from comparing the positions of Representative Rashida Tlaib (D-Michigan 13th District) and my own congressman Aaron Bean (MAGA-Florida 4th District).  When Tlaib was introduced as a guest on today’s edition of MSNBC’s “The Weekend,” I considered turning it off.  But Obama asked me “to listen;” so I did.

Tlaib began by saying she was glad the national security supplemental appropriation had been broken into three separate bills.

  • She said she will enthusiastically vote for Ukraine funding to deter Putin’s invasion and potential threat to all of Eastern Europe and possibly the world.  And she castigated House Speaker Mike Johnson and MAGA representatives for taking six months to consider the same measure that had been on the table since October 2023.  I couldn’t argue with that.
  • She then said she was going to vote against aid to Israel even though she supported the Biden administration’s efforts to join with Britain, and regional Arab allies to thwart Iran’s missile attack against Israel.  She would have voted for aid if it were limited to defensive weapons, e.g., to ensure the future viability of the “Iron Dome.”  She also said return of all the October 7th hostages should be a priority.  Her “no” vote was not a vote against Israel, but a vote against giving unrestricted assistance to Benjamin Netanyahu who seems unwilling to heed the international community’s concern about more civilian deaths in southern Gaza. Sounds like this “radical progressive” is lining up with an increasing super-majority of Israeli citizens

This does not excuse Tlaib for some previous comments about Israel and the Holocaust for which she was roundly criticized by members of her own party.  [MAGites, are you listening?]  Which brings me back to my own congressman Aaron Bean.  Upon returning from a “factfinding” trip to Israel, Bean issued the following statements.

Our message is unmistakable: We stand with our dear ally Israel shoulder to shoulder, side by side, hand in hand, today, tomorrow, and always.

While President Biden’s weak-kneed appeasement continues to embolden Iran-backed Hamas, I traveled to Israel to meet with senior officials, leaders, and soldiers who are fearlessly fighting each day for survival. We cannot abandon Israel in her darkest hour.

Sounds more like an “Israel First” policy or “Israel, right or wrong.”  On that basis, Bean must think the humanitarian crisis in Gaza and the deaths of civilian women and children are okay.  Which begs the question, if Israel took steps that precipitated a full-scale regional war, or worse, you would stand by them side-by-side?

And in true MAGA fashion, the second statement is peppered with lies and hypocrisy.  The evidence leading up to October 7, 2034 suggests Netanyahu is the only one who appeased Hamas.  If Bean is so concerned about soldiers “fearlessly fighting each day for survival,” why has he joined those who held up funding for Ukraine for six months?

Which brings me back to Gottfried’s joke and its relevance to the college course on the Israel/Hamas war.  When the genie says that peace in the Middle East is beyond his powers, instead of asking for personal gratification, what if the old man had asked, “Can you at least make sure this does not lead to nuclear war?”  The genie nods his head.  “I already have. Why do you think I asked Obama to give that speech?”  Nuclear war happens when everyone talks and never listens.

For what it’s worth.
Dr. ESP

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